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2001-11-17 On the phone last night, Henry remarked that money makes room for freedom - the freedom of choice - the freedom to buy and give - that the issue of money never ceases - that this will be an ongoing issue throughout life. Amber recently stated in her online journal that she has no problem working ceaselessly for money because it gives her the opportunity to buy and give things to her girlfriend, Christel, which produce a spiral of happiness in their lives. But can freedom be imposed upon our lives? If yes - is it really freedom? Then, how can true freedom be a societal construct to be bought and sold? True, we Americans live in a society where we have the freedom to pursue freedom, meanwhile in the Sudan and Palestine, people live lives perpetually daunted by foes, wars, famines, and poverty. Freedom cannot be had if your life has no time for it. But freedom cannot be had if your moments are filled putting off freedom - by working ceaselessly. So then, is the lack of freedom imposed by enemies who want to kill you, societal constructs, or just your own personal lack of imagination or vision for a better world? Is freedom to be found in the mind, then, where it is our choice to perceive things as this or that? I have to continually remind myself to not begin every statement with an “I” - to be mindful of other people when it is wholly easier to be absentminded and selfish - to tell myself that other people’s perceptions of me, while flawed, are unimportant so long as I am mindful of my actions in my daily life. Then I must wonder if freedom is a result of restrictions placed upon our very consciousness - can freedom be a result of mental regulations? Should I tell myself to not think this and to allow myself to think that, based on some belief I’ve created for myself? If yes, I would tell myself to be present, to be here now, to be in this moment, which is a constant struggle, but the most worthwhile adventure I can think of. If yes, I would tell myself to be pure action, and to dismiss theory for intuition. Is it possible to obtain freedom of consciousness - to be free within moments without pondering the attitudes of others, who may or may not be caged into their own mental constructs that would otherwise inhibit me but which would detract from my happiness and moment? Is freedom a dancing inside rapture or is it to be bought? Either way, do I need money just to make this decision? Is it possible to begin my days in a state of awareness and to end them in a state of contentment, falling asleep happily for having completed another day of freedom whereby I made the conscious decision to be free? Will I know when I have been liberated or will I simply be liberated? Will I be liberated from the attempts of other people to devalue my existence and push me off course, to trample my freedom which offends their aesthetics? Would not, if they were free, understand the synonimity between their freedom and mine, and thus encourage our respective paths while acknowledging our differences? Would it not be important for me to simply be so that they may see that there are a multitude of possibilities for existence? That then gives them the freedom to reach to higher levels of personal existence - we need to be that doorway for each other - do we not? Opening our vision to the multitudes. What is more selfish - keeping our vision inside and burying it in the sand in the fear that we will be hated for what we believe or giving it away whether or not it is appreciated despite fearing that we will be hated for being so egotistical as to think that our vision is worthy of sharing? Will we finally be free when we’ve quit asking these questions? Is it worth it to liberate your self if you don’t break down the chains that bind everyone else around you?
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